You know, we have all been through some horrible things in - be it, our short or long - lives. Many of us fail to disclose the hardships, and that is a choice that is often based on the positivity associated with focusing on the good. For a lot of you, I am that person. Yet, for those of which I choose to get closer with, you know that whole persona has its barriers and internal qualms.
After years of trying to overcome the events of my past, I'd be lying if I said I am now this openly happy person. Yes, of course I try to be. And, in many instances the bubbles of my personality shine when my mind - in the odd occasion - isn't preoccupied by the deep dark secrets of the late 90s, early 2000s. But then again, I don't want you all to read this and conclude that Beery is in fact a negative omen.
In all honesty, I think we are all guilty of just moving on. Putting things behind us, without truly addressing them. If I look back, I was given many opportunities to address my issues - but never took them. And, with that, I ended up here: stressed and anxious, worried about others, and trying so hard to fit in that it ends up hurting me.
And, yet, if fitting in is all that I desire, why did I just decide to un-fit and turn around, denying myself of an opportunity of a lifetime all because of my conscience and its underlying blanket of doubt. Moreover, this un-fitting (if that's how you want to define it) will probably result in a crossroads... a divide where I leave who I thought I was behind.
You see, I'm ready to leave the confides of my past and venture into the person I want to be. Although I may have turned down this opportunity, I suppose when it is right, I won't have this internal battle of Go vs Stay.
Anyway, this video sums it all up pretty well...
Have a good 'hump day',